Last Week

(Here's something I jotted down last 030611)

This past week has been very eye-opening and very exciting for me. Pao came up to Baguio and we made our commitments to the relationship, not just to ourselves. We decided to pray daily and to have accountability partners. But most important, though we fell, we made the decision to commit our lives to obeying God and glorifying His Name, whether we be together or away from each other. To God be all the glory and praise.

Last Monday, I was also able to confirm that the blessing Mrs. Grace Gupana gave me pushed through. God truly is a God who provides! I praise You, Jehovah Jireh!

Last Friday afternoon was an even more glorifying time; What God does for the good of those who love Him is just truly awesome. My dad & I fought, and we fought really hard. It was very provoking, and I remember that the anger was just so intense.

But last Thursday, Mom and I talked too, and eventually God moved through our conversation. My mom opened up, and when she said there was a "wall" between me and Dad, her words just struck me - what she said, and what just happened to be playing in my mind was "Tear Down The Walls" by Hillsong United couldn't have been more timely and impacting.

I expressed and confessed with my mouth that I wanted to get rid of the wall. I wanted to take out this defensive attitude. I wanted to think of myself less, and God more.

And so we prayed. We rebuked generational curses. We rebuked selfishness, bitterness, and pride. We commanded anger and bad attitudes to leave the house, in the Name of Yeshua Ha'Mashiach.

As the anger I felt last Friday subsided, I felt the need to calm down and talk to Dad - Friday evening approached, and differences needed to be settled before the Sabbath dinner. We talked, and I believe that time I had with my Dad was a manifestation of the prayers my Mom and I declared.

For the first time I saw my Dad as a human being - I did not see the invincible Colonel, just my Dad. I saw how much he loved his family so much, and all that he did had its reasons; I felt his sincerity, and moreover his regret when he admitted that he was too harsh. I apologized, he apologized. I came clean about my past sins against him, and when I expected him to lash back, he opened up and told me how he hurt his own parents too. He told me not to feel obligated, but to be responsible. Forgiveness was in the room. I forgave him, and he forgave me.

It has been a while since I told my Dad that I loved him, and really meant it. After telling him I loved him, I told him that he was "the man." He replied, "You all make me the man."

As I look back at these events, I just remember how I felt like such a huge load was taken out of me. I was carrying this bitterness all this time and I never really thought it was weighing me down at all. Forgiveness leads to freedom. Forgiveness leads to healing.

We are truly blessed to be blessings, and we are blessed only through our relationship with Jesus Christ - the more we give Him, the more we are given to give.

To God be all the glory, to God be all the praise.
To God be all the honor, from my birth to dying days.

I love you. God bless you.